All of us do not love when we are deceived. But, alas, a lie — the frequent and widespread phenomenon in interpersonal communication. And if to tell more precisely, then the lie is a need for our world. If the person tells only the truth, then he will remain without family, without friends and without work.
Let's understand what most often provokes people to tell a lie and how to distinguish a lie when it is extremely necessary?
Why people lie?
- Lie as means of manipulation
- The lie is first of all misinformation. The person can misinform us in order that it is imperceptible for ourselves to operate our behavior and to send it to the course, necessary for himself. For example, the seller wishing to sell us the rejected or low-quality goods, certainly, does not confess that the goods rejected, and on the contrary, to us in every possible way will extol it.
Lie in the form of protective weapon
Very often resort to a lie to avoid a conflict situation and to secure themselves against someone's attacks. Such lie is most often peculiar to children or diffident adults. For example, many of us in the childhood pulled out from the diary leaves with the two at home not to get it on the nose from parents.
Lie as humanity manifestation
Sometimes we lie because we do not want to upset the person or we are afraid to cause him mental anguish. If, for example, you see that very expensive suit which was bought by your girlfriend, not too to her to the person, then hardly on a question of the girlfriend: "Tell, however, me there is my new thing?", you will honestly answer: "Horror! You in this suit are similar to an effigy!". Most likely, you or tactfully keep silent, or praise a suit of the girlfriend that not to upset her.
The tool against others tactlessness or inappropriate curiosity
Practically all of us periodically resort to a lie when climb to us in soul or ask too immodest questions. For example, if unfamiliar, but too curious person begins to inquire suddenly at you small details of your family life, then вряд you will begin to satisfy others curiosity, spreading frankly as you quarrel with parents or sort out the relations with the spouse.
As we see, in many cases people provoke each other to a lie. Besides, a lie — not always angrily, and the truth — not always kindly. Sometimes excessive truthfulness borders on tactlessness. It is unlikely you will have good feelings to the person who, at seeing you, will begin to yell: "Oh, as you awfully look today! Whether ached with what? And recovered as! What, you do not watch a diet?". Most likely, you will feel offense and indignation even if you will understand that everything told — the truth.
And, nevertheless, there are in life cases when it is very important to know, the person deceives, or tells the truth. How to distinguish the truth from a lie and in time просечь that moment when the person lay? In principle, to learn to distinguish a lie easily, it is only necessary to have the developed observation and it is good to monitor the speech, gestures and a mimicry of the interlocutor.
Methods of recognition of a lie
- How to determine a lie by a mimicry?
- The interlocutor tries to ignore your eyes, taking a look aside — it means that he with you is not sincere.
- When you ask an important question in a forehead, the interlocutor squeezes lips and frowns — it does not like your question and he, most likely, is not going to answer it honestly.
- Inappropriate or feigned smile — one of bright signs of a lie.
- If, looking at you in an emphasis, the interlocutor slightly blinks eyes — it signals about what he does not trust you and wants from you to hide something, or asks the price of you and estimates whether it will be possible to deceive you.
- The lie signs which are shown in gestures
- The interlocutor puts brushes in the lock or crosses hands on a breast — it means that it does not like the direction of a conversation, it wants to be closed from you and is not going to be frank.
- During the conversation with you, the interlocutor often covers a mouth with a hand or touches fingers the person — it means that he not only is secretive, but also is nervous.
- The interlocutor repeatedly changes a pose, fidgets on a chair, does not know where to put hands — a conversation with you causes in it internal discomfort, he is confused, does not know what to tell you, and would like to stop a conversation quicker.
- How to distinguish a lie at communication?
- The interlocutor too long thinks before answering your question — perhaps, he considers as to you more plausibly to lie.
- The speech of the interlocutor nervous and confused, and on your questions he gives uncertain, confused, illogical answers — or he is absolutely incompetent in about what he speaks, or he to you lies.
- The interlocutor so actively tries to convince you of something that several times repeats same, at the same time speaks with pressing, a little louder, than it is necessary — often such speech is peculiar to liars who try to seem sincere and convincing.
- The interlocutor suddenly loses a thought, begins to stammer — perhaps he got confused in the lie or understood that he not that told something.
Unfortunately, it is not always possible to distinguish a lie, even being a keen observer and a good fiziognomist. It is easy to expose inexperienced and not too skillful liar. But there are skilled liars who got used to lie and perfectly control the mimicry, words and gesticulation therefore to get to the core of them very much and very difficult. So, one may say, that the only way guaranteeing protection against any liars is a habit to trust not words of the person, but only his acts!
Video: why the person lies?
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