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Why the husband does not want the child and how to convince him of the return?

03 January 2018
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  1. Because of what men do not hurry with posterity?
  2. What to do to the woman wishing to give rise?
  3. Video: the man does not want to have children what to do?

When the young wife starts with the husband a conversation that "time to think of children" came, she, as a rule, expects to hear exclamations of joy and approval. And if in reply the woman sees the scared face of the husband and hears something it seems: "Burning down, give better we will wait a little with it", she feels very strong disappointment and offense on the husband, asking a question why the husband does not want the child?

The similar situation meets quite often. On observations of family psychologists, about 80% of husbands even if do not express unwillingness to have children aloud, then feel at least slight concern at the thought of prospect of paternity. According to the mute, about 7% of stains happen on the soil of disagreement of the man to become the father.




Dispute between young spouses on a subject to have or not to have the child easily can develop into the serious conflict and even to end with a divorce. The matter is that in most cases, women extremely painfully react to a situation when the husband refuses replenishment of a family, based on quite explainable facts:

  • Fear to be late to give rise. The reproductive century of the woman is not really long, and it is desirable that the first time the woman gave rise at least up to 25-27 years. The further, the it is heavier to give birth. And most of women dream not of one, and of two, and even of three children.
  • Deep offense on the man. Quite often young wife argues so: time the husband does not want to have the child from it, he means it does not love.
  • Strong maternal instinct. For many women children are sense of all life. And the refusal of the man to have children sounds for them blasphemously.

Because of what men do not hurry with posterity?

So why husbands do not want to become fathers and to arrive properly in such situation to their wives? The behavior of the woman has to make a start from the reason of unwillingness of the man to have children whom can be a little.

Fear of responsibility
The child needs to be grown up, learned, lifted up... And many men are simply not sure that they will be able to cope with all this.
"to live desire for itself"
Many young husbands argue so: "We are young people, all life ahead, we will manage to give birth to children still. Where and why to hurry?". Such reasonings first of all are caused by a reluctance to limit themselves in pleasures and entertainments which it is necessary to refuse when the child appears.





Because of fear to fade into the background Many males worry that with the birth of the kid the woman will not be able to pay them as much care and attention as earlier. Alas, egoism and unwillingness are in a varying degree peculiar to most of men to restrain itself in something. Fear of financial problems To grow up the child — expensive pleasure. Lifting up the successor, the young family quite often should restrain itself in the most necessary. And if the young husband did not decide on a profession yet and did not get permanent job with a good salary, then desire to wait a little with pregnancy quite naturally as it is caused by sense of responsibility of the man before future child. Bad relations with the wife Happens and so that having married also some time of gains the spouse, the man begins to doubt correctness of the choice and to think of a divorce. Then its refusal to have the child can be especially sharp and categorical.

Than it was caused unavailability of the man to have children, the woman should not make very widespread fatal flaw at all — to become pregnant and give birth contrary to desire of the husband. Many women fondly believe that they should become pregnant and to give rise as the husband will thaw at the sight of the kid at once, will not get to anywhere and will even be glad and happy.

But, actually, similar behavior of women in most cases infuriates men and can even push to a rupture of the relations. Men like to feel masters of the situation and fairly believe that they have the right to vote in the solution of a question of appearance of the child too.

What to do to the woman wishing to give rise?

  • To talk quietly and seriously to the spouse for the purpose of clarification of the true reason for which the husband does not want to become a father. In the course of the conversation it can quite become clear that the man does not perceive the married situation seriously at all and not against to join ranks of bachelors again. Then, certainly, the question of the child will disappear by itself.
  • To connect to process of "persuading" of the husband of all relatives and the closest acquaintances. It is known that long to resist opinion of the majority there are enough forces not at everyone.
  • To calm alarms and doubts of the man, having explained to him that with the advent of the general child he will become for the spouse still lyubimy, also zhelanny is more expensive.
  • It is a little, at least one or two years, to wait — and suddenly the man himself at last will ripen for paternity and will want the child.

And how to be if it is impossible to put a situation in motion, and the man flatly refuses even to speak about the prospect of replenishment of a family? Probably, in that case the woman should think: whether she is ready to live with the man who can present it joy of motherhood never?

Video: the man does not want to have children what to do?

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